Sunday, 8 July 2007

Never mind Dr Who and his Tardis, I was catapulted forward in time today.

The “Loads of Time” Lord arrived with his assistant , not in a Tardis, though the car was blue with some interesting silver streaks down the side. It might have been a sonic screwdriver sticking out of the front wing but to be honest it looked more like a wire coat hanger to me.

This charming, tall, imposing lordly creature picked me up with ease by way of a interspecies greeting and offered me the Galaxy. Or rather a piece of his chocolate bar.

As his assistant struggled in with the baggage extracted from the Tardis-like depths of the boot, the “What’s the Time” Lord did what only he can do. Said he would be with this Earthling for only five minutes but stretched time out to at least thirty minutes. Needing refuelled, he picked up the rock specimens scattered about my kitchen, examined them minutely and popped them in his mouth.
Save giving the left over garlic bread to the birds I thought.

Have you noticed that previous incarnations of Time Lords never knew quite where they were going and this “Heck, Is that the Time” Lord was no different. Calling on the assistance of K9 or was it Tom-Tom, we found the co-ordinates of the next place at which he and his companion were due to materialise . Honestly,even if they are thousands of years old, these boys shouldn’t be let out without their mother.

But the best was yet to come. With the aid of only some common chemicals, soap and water, the “Running out of Time” Lord was transformed in what seemed like only a moment in the great space continuum.. He was regenerated from a scruffy time traveller, in ripped jeans and with a hairstyle that only a Gallifreyan would love, to an elegant, suave Master of the Universe, clothed with the very best the distant planet Mossbros could offer.

Don’t know why he had to leave that studded antenna in his eyebrow though. Perhaps it’s to communicate with his mother. She is human after all. She’ll certainly have words with him about it.

His assistant, no less richly dressed, required special visors in order to keep his body temperature down or were they really only aviator sunglasses worn indoors to look cool?

A final adjustment of the special neckware required to endear them to those aliens from the planet Venus and they were off, into a new dimension.

Yes, the delightful just finished-A-levels son of a friend, and his mate, turned up today.
He ate, drank, showered and changed into black tie for a nearby party in the blink of an eye.
And it seems, that in only a blink of an eye, he’s grown from a darling, cuddly little boy to a handsome, confident young man.
Who needs to travel through time? It’s already going too fast.

11 comments:

snailbeachshepherdess said...

Yep..saw a Shropshire version of this serial last Friday....trouble is ...they reverted!!!

UN PEU LOUFOQUE said...

Well at least he shared the chocolate!!

The Country Craft Angel said...

Oh, that was great.

So true-seems like only yesterday and they were baby's.

You are lucky though, mine wouldn't share the chocolate!

warm wishes

The Country Craft Angel said...

Sorry, me again.

Just to say just caught up on your last couple of blogs.
Agreed with others about youngest tennis prowess-didn't hurt Mr MacEnroe!

Left comment on your MOthers day one. Don't know how I miss you-not sure whether you always announce on blog page?
Anyway I do find your style of writing easy on the eye.
Lovely stuff.

warm wishes

@themill said...

And I can admit, dear readers, that was the baggy bottomed second son. Haven't seen the new antenna yet, but it will go with the tattoo he thinks I don't know about!!

elizabethm said...

aargh, we only just did the A level and now 25 year old son is clearly contemplating marriage. please can life slow down.

FunkyMunky said...

Wonderful writing!! You are so right about time going too fast, I wish it would slow down - or even stop altogether for a while - do you think the timelord could arrange that??

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Time is moving, fast. I've realised as I get older, the day's are shorter. I don't understand it because there's still the same amount of hours in a day. Perhaps a step back will enable us to relive all these wonderful memories once more.

Crystal xx

Pondside said...

Lovely visit from the alien creatures! I loved your blog!...and the tennis one too. Boys really are creatures from another galaxy, aren't they?

Exmoorjane said...

Ah all this is yet to come.....and probably next week the rate time is indeed flying.
Loved the tennis story too.....wish I could get James to pick up tennis - it's about the only sport I was ever remotely reasonable at.....
Loved your comment on my blog too!!

mutterings and meanderings said...

And it seems only yesterday that it was my A-level summer ... but it was 20 years ago. How scary is that? :)